Domestic Violence

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

1 IN 3 WOMEN WILL SUFFER PHYSICAL AND / OR SEXUAL VIOLENCE THROUGHOUT THEIR LIFE

Domestic violence encompasses a variety of coercive behaviors to establish and maintain control from one person to another. It can happen in the family, with people in a relationship, or with an ex and it happens in all cultures and socio-economic levels, regardless of religion, gender, or sexual orientation. Abuse can manifest itself physically, verbally, emotionally, psychologically, sexually, and financially.

For help and support in domestic violence situations , call Mujeres in Action at 509-869-0876. Also, you can call the Helpline of the YWCA in Spokane to the 509-326-2255, available 24 hours.

Am I in an abusive relationship?

Domestic Violence Helpline

YWCA - 24 Hours :

509-326-2255

(Interpreters available by phone)

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Types of abuse

Myths and realities

Safety planning

 

Am I in an abusive relationship?

If you answer "Yes" to some of these questions, you may be in an abusive relationship.

  • Does your partner's temperament scare you?

  • Does your partner intimidate you?

  • Are you afraid of disagreeing?

  • Do you often give in because you are afraid of your partner's reaction?

  • Does your partner make you feel bad and then tell you that they love you?

  • Does your partner criticize you for everyday things of daily living such as cooking, his clothes, his appearance, etc.?

  • Do you feel that you have to justify everything you do, the places where you go and the people with whom you meet, to prevent your partner from getting angry?

  • Does your partner humiliate or demean you with insults and / or accusations?

  • Does your partner make frequent threats to withhold money or resources, take your children away, or have an affair?

  • Does your partner threaten you to call the immigration or seek to cancel an immigration petition in process to fix your status if you do not do what they ask?

  • Have you been kicked, hit, pushed, restricted, or has your partner thrown things at you?

  • Do you keep distance from your friends and family because your partner is jealous if you don't?

  • Do you feel isolated and alone?

  • Has your partner forced you to have sex or some sexual contact when you did not want to?

  • Are you afraid of ending a relationship because your partner has threatened to hurt or hurt you?

  • Do you feel that your partner's family or your own family intimidates or controls you?

  • Is someone denying you medications you need to maintain good health?

  • Do you experience a pattern of violence in your relationship?

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Types of abuse

 
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Hitting, biting, kicking, threatening to hit, breaking things, excessively tickling, pushing, throwing, prodding, scratching, strangling, reckless driving, denying medicine, murder.

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PHYSICAL

PHYSICAL

Yelling, cursing, insulting, imitating, demeaning comments, twisting words, making statements of guilt, sarcasm, using sensitive information against you, demanding, accusing, playing mind games such as denying abusive incidents or previous engagements, undermining your sense of reality.

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EMOTIONAL

EMOTIONAL

Forcing the sexual act, inappropriate sexual acts (in private or in public), intimidation to perform non-reciprocal sexual acts, sexual threats with objects, forcing to participate or to watch pornography.

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SEXUAL

SEXUAL

Controlling all money, sabotaging attempts to go to work or school, not allowing the partner to work outside the home, refusing to work and forcing the partner to support the family, accumulating credit cards in the partner's name.

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FINANCIAL

FINANCIAL

 

Myths and realities

1. Alcohol and drugs cause domestic violence

Although alcohol and drugs are factors that can increase the chances of violence, they are not the main cause. There are people who abuse alcohol and drugs without becoming violent. Similarly, there are abusive people who do not use alcohol or drugs.

2. Anger is the cause of domestic violence

Many abusive people with anger problems are not violent towards other people outside the home. Generally, these people who generate violence do not have more anger than the rest of the population. Anger is just an excuse to control and dominate your partner.

3. Victims often provoke violence

NOBODY DESERVES TO BE ABUSED. Victims often live in fear and do everything possible to avoid an episode of violence. The only person responsible for the abuse is the person who commits the abuse. Victims are never at fault.

4. If a person were really abused, they would leave the relationship

Statistics show that when a victim tries to leave her abusive partner, the chances of violence increase much more, putting their life in danger. Therefore, fear is one of the main factors why many victims are trapped in an abusive relationship.

5. Abuse only occurs in dysfunctional families, especially minorities, and families with low socioeconomic status

Domestic violence manifests itself at all social and cultural levels regardless of race, ethnic group, religion, class, sex, sexual orientation, immigration status, or level of education.

Safety planning

 

A safety plan is a specific, realistic, and personalized plan that includes ways you can be safe while in an abusive relationship, planning to leave, or even after you leave. If you are in immediate danger or if you need medical attention, please call 911.

 

To get more   For information about a safety plan, contact us at 509-869-0876 or send an email to info@miaspokane.org .

 

Much of a safety plan has to do with mitigating risks and appropriating resources to be in a safe place. Of course, there are things that are beyond our control such as the behavior of the aggressor. However, it is important to plan.

2. Keep a record of incidents of violence and / or take photos of injuries. This is important to do even if you are not thinking of making a report. Maybe you will change your mind later.

1. Keep your personal identification like driver's license, birth certificate, passport, etc. on hand or in a safe place. This also includes any immigration documentation if you have a pending case.

While each plan should be individual according to the needs of each person, these are some steps you can take if it is in your power to do so:

3. Have an escape plan in the event of an incident of violence. Think of a back door or window that you can exit through in an emergency or a room where you can lock yourself up.

4. Have the contact of a trusted family member or friend and a list of local resources such as shelters, food banks, immigration assistance , etc.

If you are in immediate danger or if you need medical attention, please call 911.

To get more   information about a safety plan, contact us at 509-869-0876 .